I believe I was saved by God's amazing Grace when I was 18. I had a tremendous change in my lifestyle and what I wanted to do with my Life and that serve Jesus my Lord and also stay in His word which is did!
I had such a vision of Jesus dying on the Cross and which has never left me to this day and I am now 86.
I remember after being saved and trusting Jesus repenting of my sin(s) and seeking to live for Him, when I first sinned (a very old sin I had developed when I was in the 7th or 8th grade. I was devastated because I thought I would never do that sin again. I was delivered immediately from the desire to drink alcohol, stop cursing, stop hating another racial group, stop smoking, and start reading the word every day, praying, going to Church, loving to fellowship with other Christians, witnessing Christ verbally, enjoying all of my days anticipating getting my Christian education in a leading Christian school. I also preached the word serving as a substitute for preachers, teaching classes, and eventually had a radio program for many years. On one occasion I pastored a local Church for a few years and also taught in a Bible Institute for several years. I was married, lost my first wife to cancer, and married again 3 years later and now for 34 years with a wonderful Christian woman I am so blessed.
I say all of this but during these years I fought, struggled, cried, wept, literally begged Christ Jesus to deliver me from a besetting sin I had trouble with most every day or at least every few days. Sometime I had several months of sensing I was delivered, but I really wasn't for I hit the deal again as usual. It is hard being under guilt and shame and disappointments like this. It even brings doubt to you through Satan and just the guilt existing that you may have not been saved at all thinking you were. The sin is pornography. Not visiting prostitutes, not committing adultery with another woman physically but just pictures and m-bation. Pray
I had such a vision of Jesus dying on the Cross and which has never left me to this day and I am now 86.
I remember after being saved and trusting Jesus repenting of my sin(s) and seeking to live for Him, when I first sinned (a very old sin I had developed when I was in the 7th or 8th grade. I was devastated because I thought I would never do that sin again. I was delivered immediately from the desire to drink alcohol, stop cursing, stop hating another racial group, stop smoking, and start reading the word every day, praying, going to Church, loving to fellowship with other Christians, witnessing Christ verbally, enjoying all of my days anticipating getting my Christian education in a leading Christian school. I also preached the word serving as a substitute for preachers, teaching classes, and eventually had a radio program for many years. On one occasion I pastored a local Church for a few years and also taught in a Bible Institute for several years. I was married, lost my first wife to cancer, and married again 3 years later and now for 34 years with a wonderful Christian woman I am so blessed.
I say all of this but during these years I fought, struggled, cried, wept, literally begged Christ Jesus to deliver me from a besetting sin I had trouble with most every day or at least every few days. Sometime I had several months of sensing I was delivered, but I really wasn't for I hit the deal again as usual. It is hard being under guilt and shame and disappointments like this. It even brings doubt to you through Satan and just the guilt existing that you may have not been saved at all thinking you were. The sin is pornography. Not visiting prostitutes, not committing adultery with another woman physically but just pictures and m-bation. Pray
This comment thread is locked. Please enter a new comment below to start a new comment thread.
Note: Comment threads older than 2 months are automatically locked.
Do you have a Bible comment or question?
Posting comments is currently unavailable due to high demand on the server.
Please check back in an hour or more. Thank you for your patience!
Report Comment
Which best represents the problem with the comment?