It's not cruel to change the "rules". Right now you can't see your life without them, just yet.
They will love you more and thank you some unexpected future day.
When my son was 18 and stretching all my house rules, curfew (I needed my sleep); things got rough. Blood pressure soaring.
One day we had a talk. I said, by your actions and reactions, I can see that you are ready to get your own place. I said__I will help you but you have to maintain control and manage day to day.
He found an apt he could manage on his income then. I gave him half of my household to furnish him with the basics: bed, chests, 1/2 my linens, a gift of basic kitchen stuff. He had an open invitation to come over to wash clothes and eat pot roast. Those times eventually got further apart as he spent time with friends and girls.
I asked him how he liked cooking his own food, making up His own rules, planning and budgeting? He gushed, I LOVE IT. That's when I knew he was launched.
It was time for me to re-connect to people my own age. At church, tool shopping, gun range :D
Google senior trips in your zipcode. Life flows forward, believe it or not. You go over to the kids places to just be a guest. You'll get used to it.
Best part is, you'll get grandkiddoes.
When you pray, just ask to be lifted in the spirit of your mind and emotions. Lean on Jesus.
If you sit home alone in front of a tv, and don't participate in life; the body starts breaking down.
Choose life.
May God be your Source to get through this part of life. Amen!
Be Strong & Don't Back Down - In Reply - 4 years ago
I'm weird I guess. I taught my 12 yr old son life skills 101 until he was 16. He learned full knowledge on how to run a household, cook real meals, yard work, maintenance on a car.
How to shop for a household, stretch your grocery money. How to never have to wear green underwear (laundry); sew on a button. He balanced my checkbook for me, to learn budgeting, paid bills and saw what was leftover :(
I let him work for roofing companies, Cleaning restaurants, grandpa's gas station. I told him it was to teach him the value of an education because low paying jobs are hard, sweaty and exhausting.
When he turned 21, he purchased his first house (a new one). He's 42 now; has 13+ houses he rents out and maintains. Works full time at a 9/5 job, has a family. He's amazing! He's teaching his son the same things.
You have to make a personal commitment to give a kid the best start in life. Schools and even Churches don't teach that. Parents have to do it.
He got some traffic tickets at 16. He knew I couldn't pay for them. I took him to the County Clerks office so he could pay them out. He learned to obey traffic laws, young.
I love being a parent. If we'd just obey God and not skip over the hard parts that are time consuming; we won't have to launch the kid. They'll launch themselves!
Let them work some summer jobs. Swimming pools don't teach them anything. Driving a car is big time maintenance and expense; they must learn. CUT OFF the fun money and they'll want to get a job. If they demand cool clothes and shoes; let them get part-time jobs.
You have to cease to be their source. They have to see their source is THEMSELVES.
My kid got to keep all his money and budget it. He was broke some months. He got the hang of it pretty quick. He got better paying jobs as he could.
I told him that no one can take your home or car, as long as you have a job to secure your freedom.
They will love you more and thank you some unexpected future day.
When my son was 18 and stretching all my house rules, curfew (I needed my sleep); things got rough. Blood pressure soaring.
One day we had a talk. I said, by your actions and reactions, I can see that you are ready to get your own place. I said__I will help you but you have to maintain control and manage day to day.
He found an apt he could manage on his income then. I gave him half of my household to furnish him with the basics: bed, chests, 1/2 my linens, a gift of basic kitchen stuff. He had an open invitation to come over to wash clothes and eat pot roast. Those times eventually got further apart as he spent time with friends and girls.
I asked him how he liked cooking his own food, making up His own rules, planning and budgeting? He gushed, I LOVE IT. That's when I knew he was launched.
It was time for me to re-connect to people my own age. At church, tool shopping, gun range :D
Google senior trips in your zipcode. Life flows forward, believe it or not. You go over to the kids places to just be a guest. You'll get used to it.
Best part is, you'll get grandkiddoes.
When you pray, just ask to be lifted in the spirit of your mind and emotions. Lean on Jesus.
If you sit home alone in front of a tv, and don't participate in life; the body starts breaking down.
Choose life.
May God be your Source to get through this part of life. Amen!
How to shop for a household, stretch your grocery money. How to never have to wear green underwear (laundry); sew on a button. He balanced my checkbook for me, to learn budgeting, paid bills and saw what was leftover :(
I let him work for roofing companies, Cleaning restaurants, grandpa's gas station. I told him it was to teach him the value of an education because low paying jobs are hard, sweaty and exhausting.
When he turned 21, he purchased his first house (a new one). He's 42 now; has 13+ houses he rents out and maintains. Works full time at a 9/5 job, has a family. He's amazing! He's teaching his son the same things.
You have to make a personal commitment to give a kid the best start in life. Schools and even Churches don't teach that. Parents have to do it.
He got some traffic tickets at 16. He knew I couldn't pay for them. I took him to the County Clerks office so he could pay them out. He learned to obey traffic laws, young.
I love being a parent. If we'd just obey God and not skip over the hard parts that are time consuming; we won't have to launch the kid. They'll launch themselves!
Let them work some summer jobs. Swimming pools don't teach them anything. Driving a car is big time maintenance and expense; they must learn. CUT OFF the fun money and they'll want to get a job. If they demand cool clothes and shoes; let them get part-time jobs.
You have to cease to be their source. They have to see their source is THEMSELVES.
My kid got to keep all his money and budget it. He was broke some months. He got the hang of it pretty quick. He got better paying jobs as he could.
I told him that no one can take your home or car, as long as you have a job to secure your freedom.
HE ALWAYS HAD A JOB
Write to me anytime
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